Making the most of my "Dash"

Posts tagged ‘Weight loss’

Testy? ME? Noooooo…

Various pills

Candy! Oh, wait...

I wrote a post not long ago about how I’ve been trying, REALLY trying, to lose weight.  I mentioned that my doctor and I agreed to use a metabolism booster since my body seemed “stuck” (to put it in the simplest terms possible).  It’s been two weeks, and I know it’s doing it’s job.  And THEN some.

Let’s just say these pills are better off being called “Testy Pills”.  I think Mister has a very different name for them.  Taking them really contradicts my normally good-natured disposition. I seem to be constantly annoyed be every little thing nowadays.  Apparently I’m also snapping at Mister.  A lot.  I didn’t realize it until the other day when I mentioned to him, “I think this pill makes me feel irritable.” His immediate response was a very loud, “You THINK?!”  Apparently “testy” really is not the right word. But, he did follow that up with letting me know he understands this is not how I am, this is not how I want to behave, and we both know why I’m even taking them.

I’ve been annoyed at the ADD-like effect this gives me.  I have a much greater empathy for those diagnosed with it.  I get really frustrated that I want to get something done, but then I can’t finish it because I’m already focusing on doing something else.  Even sitting here typing this is annoying for me because I want to get this blog post done, but I can’t seem to focus on it properly. I’ve rewritten it twice now.  *sigh* I’ve actually been meaning to write this one for over a week, but it has just seemed like it would take too much time to sit down and type it.

I am more impatient than ever now.  While we were shopping today I wanted to ram the cart into some lady who cut me off.  I also wanted to smack the elderly women in the store taking up the entire aisle while looking at a something on the shelf.  Normally people who do that still annoy me, but I’ll patiently wait and then smile as I pass them.  But not today. Today, I had this incredible urge to grab the nearest item and chuck it at her while yelling at her “MOVE IT, LADY!!” Actually, I didn’t use those nice words inside my head.  I had better ones for her.  Obviously, I restrained myself from doing any of that since I’m sitting here typing this and Mister is not bailing me out of jail.

I’m doing fairly well at keeping the irritability under control.  The fact that Mister has come back into the house, interrupted me twice while I’ve been focused on this, and each time I was able to stop and smile at him, is a testament to how well I’m keeping it under control.  I am happy that I only have another two weeks of this.  I’m sure Mister is a lot more anxious for that time to pass and is counting down the days.  I have definitely seen some progress with the weight-loss, so at least it is working.  I do have to admit to being very concerned about how I’ll feel after I stop taking these.  I stopped drinking coffee, for obvious reasons, but I may end up having “four cup” coffee mornings after this is over.  Or maybe I’ll start sleeping. A lot. Either way, Mister is going to want his nice Missy back, and not this psychotic, almost homicidal killer of rude-women-shopping-in-grocery-stores.

(Make that four interruptions now, but who’s counting)

Keeping the dash interesting (from my perspective anyway)


P.S. I would be very remiss if I did not make note of the fact that directly after I finished writing this and went with Mister to pick up the kids we had what we’ll call a discussion.  Mister asked a question and I answered.  Mister then asked if I was feeling “testy”.  Now, maybe I’m the *only* woman in the world who gets her back up at that, but that comment was rather, er…. provocative.  I really wasn’t being testy with my response, I was nowhere near that, but Mister repeated that I was not “being myself”.  And after THAT, I went from perceived testiness to actual testiness.

I only write this to say that [while I did not acknowledge this in our resulting discussion] I realized later he probably was right.  (Do you know how hard that is for me to say? VERY hard.) I really didn’t mean to be harsh, sharp, testy or whatever with him.  But, I’m thinking that this medicine is not bringing out my bestest, brightest, and shiniest qualities.  I think he may have intimated that, but I’m sure it got lost between thoughts of “I am NOT being testy” and “not being myself? REALLY?!” So, while I oh-so-nicely (ha!) insisted that I was completely fine as he was insisting that I wasn’t, I might have overlooked the fact that the medicine has indeed made me testy AND sensitive.  I have to do a mea culpa here and say he is the one more likely to be correct given the current circumstances.  And once again, I must put out in the internet world (where it lasts forever) that he was right and I was wrong.  Ugh.

“You need to eat more.” Wha?!?!

Just me

I’m a little “buzzy” this morning, and so I’m going to try to stay focused here, but NO promises!!

I’ve pretty much struggled with my weight my whole life.   I was at my worst in December of 2008 at a whopping 188 pounds (GULP!).  Enter separation/divorce/family problems and a year later I had lost 42 pounds simply due to stress.  I was actually excited about the weight loss (definitely not the stress!) because I was only 11 pounds away from my goal weight of 135!  I thought to myself…

“I am NEVER gaining that weight back again!”

Famous last words, right?!

Well, I started working in January of 2010, and I kept eating junk food and snacking constantly.  I never really exercised and so I slowly started gaining weight over the next year.

By March I had gained back about 7 pounds and thought, ok, it’s time to lose this and get serious about getting down to 135.  So, I cut out the junk food, and started seriously exercising.  And I KEPT gaining weight.  I got up to 158 and was starting to freak out a bit.  We went on vacation for the summer, and we didn’t eat so very well.  Not horrible like I was the year before, but not really focused on healthy eating.  We also hardly got any exercise in.  I ended up gaining another 10 pounds.  Ugh.

So when we returned from vacation in August I got really serious about losing weight.  We’ve been walking/running between 10 – 15 miles a week, as well as doing some core exercises at home.  I cut out lots of the junk, and hardly ever snack at all.  Over the last two and a half months I’ve lost a total of 3 pounds.  THREE POUNDS.  Plus, I started getting some odd symptoms that I thought might mean I was peri-menopausal. (If you’re a guy and you just read that last sentence, I am SO sorry!)  I called the doctor and had her do some blood work that we figured I didn’t need at my last appointment.  Besides the weight gain, I also mentioned that I was getting hot flashes (at the weirdest times too), and told them that Brad kindly mentioned that I was a “bit” moody.  Enter yesterday’s doctor appointment…

Yesterday morning I was having a bit of difficulty with the kids coming back from their visit and the usual readjusting.  Certain things that are said to the kids that put pressure on them bother me, but there’s nothing I can do about that other than be the best parent I can be and encourage my kids to grow up and be the people THEY want to be.  On top of dealing with that, I had to go see the doctor and was fairly nervous.  She walks in and says my blood work is 100% completely normal!  After discussing the issues I had with her, and how hard I’ve been trying to lose weight, she says…

“I think your problem is that you’re not eating enough.  You need to eat MORE.”

Words sent directly from heaven above.  I love her.  I love food.  Seriously though, she thinks the problem is that I’ve plateaued (clearly!) and I am not giving myself enough protein.  After MUCH discussion we decided on giving my body a jump-start by prescribing a medicine that is pretty much a metabolic stimulant for only 30 days.  I took it this morning.  All I can say is… BUZZYYYYYYYY.

Mister and I did our walk/run this morning.  I felt so good that we actually went around the block again!  Usually by the time we get home I’m ready to crawl up the driveway and drag myself over to the porch chair and rest.  This time it took all I could do to remain seated in the chair.  I’ve also been talking a hundred miles an hour.  Poor Mister is tolerating the chattiness, but he has called me Chatty Cathy at least twice today.  We both agreed (and the doctor recommended this too), that since I’m SO wired (you should see my hands as I try to type this…zoom!) that tomorrow will be a half a pill.  She also said I could even go every other day, if necessary.

I’m pretty unfocused today, only because I’m jumping from one thing to the next.  I even told Mister that we could put his HAM antenna up today (you know, from where we took the monstrous satellite dish down) and that I would even HELP him.  Yes, tomorrow will only be a half a pill.

I forgot to make my egg this morning (more protein!), so I’m off to do that shortly.  I’m going to be very careful with this, and monitor how I feel and what happens with my body.  I’ve already recognized that a whole pill is too much.  The doctor said a lot of what I thought was peri-menopausal stuff really is just related to the weight gain.  She was very proud of me for living a healthier life-style, and I’m pretty proud of that myself.  I’ve always been a junk-food muncher, and that’s just not something I want in my life anymore.  Plus, 40 is right around the corner and I know it’ll be harder to get it off then.

Ok, off to get rid of some energy! We’ve got a HAM thingy to set up! (Mister won’t like that I called it a thingy either… o_O)

Trying to make my dash better by getting rid of some extra me!


P.S.  I know some of you may want to tell me what a bad thing it is for me to take this.  Please don’t.  I’ve only given you a very brief description about what my doctor and I discussed at length, will all of the concerns that come with it.  If you wanted to say something about it, just know that I know it’s because you care! I promise to take good care of me! 😉

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