Making the most of my "Dash"

Me and My Sweetheart

For many, many years, my birthday, Mother’s Day, Valentine’s Day, and anniversaries were not really celebrated.  I often heard, “Sorry, it came up so quick I forgot to get time off” or “Sorry, I didn’t have enough money.”  (or apparently any time to even do a handwritten card). I also had (and probably still do) a habit of replying, “It’s ok. I don’t mind.” to these sorts of comments.  I certainly didn’t want to make the other person feel bad.  Even though it made me feel bad, very bad, inside.

So, in order to compensate for the disappointed feeling that I would get when these holidays came around , I just decided that Mother’s Day wasn’t for me anyway.  It was for my mom.  Plus, it’s just another way for the card companies to make money.  And Valentine’s Day… Well, Valentine’s Day was a stupid holiday anyway.  Chocolates were too expensive, flowers were astronomical, restaurants were too busy, gifts were too expensive, and all the lovey-lovey people were just annoying.  So with my lowered expectations (that were met without fail), I was never disappointed around these holidays.

Well, turns out that was another life.

Mister is having no such attitude from me.  My vocal protests of the extra holidays that “don’t mean anything” can not withstand the determination of my “romantical” (to use his word) husband.  He refuses to let Valentine’s Day pass without some sort of token of our love expressed.  Preferably homemade.  He does not like the commercialization of the holidays either, but his determination comes from a desire to prove to me that I am worth thinking of on these days.  I am worth going to the store for a $2 (make that $5, nowadays) card.  I am worth a box of chocolates.  I am worth being taken out to dinner.  I am worth his thoughts and his time.

The only thing that makes his view of Valentine’s Day acceptable to me is the fact that it doesn’t have to be Valentine’s Day for me to have these things.  I’ve come home countless times to fresh flowers on the entry table.  To a bag of snack size Reese’s Peanut Butter cups.  To a card that says, “Just Because I Love You”.  I get taken out on a date-night almost every Tuesday evening.  Every day with Mister is Valentine’s Day.  I know without a doubt that I am his sweetheart, and he is mine.  So, when Valentine’s Day arrives tomorrow, Mister and I will spoil each other a little more usual.  And I will take this opportunity to tell Mister some of the things I love about him:

  • I love how you say, “Good Morning, Beautimus!” to me every morning when we wake up.
  • I love that you always want to hold my hand.
  • I love how you try to anticipate my every need and meet it, even before I know I have a need.
  • I love how you try to race me to fold the laundry… and how sometimes you’ll try to be sneaky and do it when I’m not paying attention.
  • I love that you like cooking our meals together.
  • I love that when something needs to be fixed in the house, or on the cars, that you take care of it…as soon as possible.
  • I love how I never worry about being broken down and stranded anymore.
  • I love how your eyes turn soft, and your mouth smiles, whenever you look at me.
  • I love how you like to snuggle on the couch in the evenings.
  • I love how you help the kids with their math homework (because we all know that I’m clueless).
  • I love how you help me be a more patient, kind, and loving parent to the kids.
  • I love how fair and kind you are to the kids, and because they know that is how you are, they respond so well to you.
  • I love when you kiss me on the forehead.
  • I love how you always give me time to work out issues when I’m upset, and that you never let me get away with shoving an issue aside rather than discussing it.
  • I love you for trying to always make my life calm, and as stress-free as possible.
  • I love you for knowing when something’s bothering me, and that you never ignore it in the hopes that it will just “go away”.
  • I love you for making me feel so beautiful, that I no longer criticize myself whenever I look in a mirror and see my body.
  • I love that when I look at you I *know*, without a doubt, that you love me too.
  • I love you for encouraging me; for reminding me that I am a smart, capable, strong, and brave woman.
  • I love you for being the kind, patient, giving, loving, sensitive, romantic, intelligent, capable, and wonderful man that you are.
  • I love you for seeing me.
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Comments on: "Valentine’s Day and Lowered Expectations" (15)

  1. misterofthedash said:

    Thank you honey. You make me feel so very lucky to have found you and that you choose to love me.

  2. Another absolutely beautiful post. Christine, he sounds PERFECT. Which, may I say, is no less than you deserve. And the best part about it is that you aren’t afraid to SAY what you love about him. You are grateful, which I think is so important…gratitude only makes us want to do more, and so the cycle continues. Love->gratitude->more love->more gratitude, and so it goes. Thank you, once again, for sharing with all of us. It’s good to be reminded that there are happy cycles as well as “vicious” ones. Thank you, my friend. May your Valentine’s Day contain an extra hug. Much love to you and yours. ❤

    – Becca

    • misterofthedash said:

      Thanks, but certainly not perfect. Age has allowed me to already make just about every mistake possible, so I learned a bit and am getting to skip over making some of them at this point in my life.

    • Becca,

      Thank you so much! I think he’s perfect! Well, at least perfect for me, anyway! He has helped me open up a lot, and helped me to say things aloud that I wouldn’t have before. I am so very grateful for him. It is finally good to be in one of those happy cycles, rather than those vicious ones. They are hard, I know. Much love to you, sweets! I hope your Valentine’s Day (and EVERY day) is wonderful, you deserve it too, you know! xoxo ~Christine

  3. You two are lucky to have each other. 🙂

    • misterofthedash said:

      We sure are! Talk about two ships passing in the night. The fact that we were able to find each other and get together is nothing short of heaven-sent. God had to align a whole bunch of stars, in a couple different galaxies, in order to bring us together.

    • Lisha, thank you… I am so blessed, and I am very grateful to God for bringing Brad into my life!

  4. ♥ You both are so fortunate and so wise to realize what you have and appreciate it. I am happy for you both. As Sinatra sang,
    .
    Love is lovelier
    The second time around
    Just as wonderful
    With both feet on the ground

    It’s that second time you hear
    Your love song sung
    Makes you think perhaps that love
    Like youth, is wasted on the young

    Love’s more comfortable
    The second time you fall
    Like a friendly home
    The second time you call

    Who can say
    What brought us to this miracle we’ve found
    There are those who’d bet
    Love comes but once and yet

    I’m oh so glad we met
    The second time around

  5. Running from Hell with El said:

    Awww. This melted me!! He is lovely and so are you. And the writing: perfect.

  6. this is just beautiful. It is so hopeful to hear of couples doing this right after years of being together. So many just complain, and you two are so sweet and appreciative and in love. I LOVE LOVE!

  7. This was simply beautiful, and I love that you shared it with me–I mean, your readers. 🙂

  8. True love rocks, does it not?

  9. misterofthedash said:

    I just stumbled upon this old blog post. You put tears in my eyes, Missy. I love you. Happy Birthday…tomorrow!

    • I love you too, my Mister! This post still holds true today as it did three and a half years ago! You have my whole heart, for my whole life. ❤

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